Falling Off the Yoga Horse

“I can't do Yoga anymore-- there is too much going on in my life and it is an emotional time for me.”  confessed a student recently.   I remember when he started his Introductory month of Yoga-- his shoulders slumped forward and his eyes drooped as he pushed the pen across the sign-in sheet. After a few months of coming to class regularly I saw him walk into the studio one day-- I had to look twice-- he was walking tall, shoulders back with a big smile on his face as he greeted me. His whole energy had changed and it was obvious that he made a positive shift in his life. 

Why fall off the Yoga horse now? The most common reasons I hear “ I cannot afford it or “I am too busy” that is my personal favorite. But deep down I know time or money is not the real reason I conveniently fill my time with everything but Yoga.  Typically, the impulse to stop my practice signals to me that something is coming up-- an inner obstacle, so to speak. The masters know this well-- resistance appears when we have bumped up against ourselves.  We can either become present and dig deeper by investigating what the block is or do a complete 180 and high-tail it the other way!  I have run many times by over-indulging my sweet tooth or over-booking myself-- “Oh, can’t practice now I am busy eating chocolate and saving the world!” It can look quite funny as I zoom off to teach a class with my thermos of chai balancing on my bumper.  But I know that running does not work because the obstacle will appear again down the road.

Inner obstacles are habitual ways of thinking or acting that are not serving your Highest good and the way in which these habits play out in your life tend to impact yourself or others.  Let’s tackle the obstacles of boredom and doubt. You are on an upswing in your Yoga practice and filled with feelings of great expansion and euphoria. You say to yourself “ Yoga is the best thing ever, I going to do this for the rest of my life!”. You even go out and indulge in $120 Lululemon yoga pants and $100 Manduka mat and make a pledge to practice 5 times a week.  After a few weeks or months you reach a plateau and the big openings subside.  You wonder if Yoga has just stopped working.  

Before you recycle your new mat, inquire a little deeper.  Why? Because, if you are bored in your practice you can bet there is a sense of dullness in your life.  There may even be a deeper pattern of incessantly looking for the next best thing by switching jobs or changing partners or getting a new iPhone every few months.  Changing out your phone may not do much harm to yourself or others but certainly being dull or disengaged in your relationships will. 

The good news is that Yoga does help you face life’s challenges with an incredible amount of strength, grace and skill but first it reveals what is blocking the flow of vital energy inside of you. Sometimes a limiting pattern and all its repercussions are difficult to look at, hence the resistance to practice.  When these obstacles arise-- this is a critical moment. If you choose to focus on your practice in the very moment you want to leave it-- you have direct access to shift it. And, you may find that the obstacle turns into a doorway that once opened it reveals a glimpse of your True Nature or the Self, Spirit, or whatever you call it. It is a state of awareness within that is completely free and infinitely joyful.  

Yoga in its true form is a purification, self-reflective, and devotional (not religious) practice. I have to mention that most of the Yoga in the West is grossly devoid of the deeper aspects of practice that can lead to real transformation-- searching for a rich, authentic and grounded Yoga class is essential.  The tools of Yoga, not only asana (postures) but also pranyama (breath), sound and meditation are designed to spiral you into your center and bring you closer to the truth of who you are by burning away what you are not.  The practice connects you to the ever-present, pulsating life-force within you that is part of the Divine energy of the Universe called Shakti. Through self-refection and consistent practice or sadhana in Sanskrit, this intensely wonderful process allows you to experience greater states of freedom and joy. Now we are talking! (I have relaxed my sweet-tooth and put away the chocolate bar.) 

This does not happen over night, nor does it happen in a linear fashion. (Ok, I will eat just one square). Patanjali’s Yoga Sutra 1.14 says that with sincere and proper practice over a long period of time that the fruits of yoga are revealed.  Like everything else in life your Yoga practice has its ups and downs too.  But quitting when you are down is not the way to go.  When you feel like quitting, this is precisely when you should engage your practice with vigor and compassion as transformation is at hand.  

Yoga is a profound path of knowing your self-- both your strengths and the habits that limit you and using them as a doorway to connect  to the Higher Self. And as Patanjali’s first Yoga Sutra says “Atha Yoganusasanam” -- And now the practice of Yoga can begin.  Yoga is a beautifully winding road with the perfect obstacles to help us realize who we are.  The journey will challenge us but the inner freedom and outer smile show that the choice to engage our practice fully was worth it!


Namaste, 
Sienna Smith RYT
yoga therapist and owner YMS  

Help! Is Yoga Good or Bad for Me?

Help! Is Yoga Good or Bad for Me? 

With the recent snow storm in the press about Yoga I can’t tell if Yoga is good or bad for me? Signed~ an open-hearted, hand-standing, stretchy-pant wearing, wheat-grass drinking yogini. (Oops...that could be me!)  Actually, I think the better question is Why do Yoga?  With news reports on falling Yoga gurus and Yogas historic link to sex cults (not true) hot in the mainstream presses I have to say I am thankful because it has spurred many people to question Yoga.  Good! Less blind followers and more awakened inquirers.  Now we can focus on what Yoga really has to offer.

Occasionally while teaching, I ask students while holding a rigorous pose like plank or chair-- Why are you practicing Yoga anyway? Why are you doing this pose, what is the point?  Spontaneous awakening occurs!  What do you mean, Why?  You can sleep through your vinyasa flow, you can check-out in downward dog but as soon as you question what you are doing, while in the act of doing it,  you are surged into the present moment.  Super!  Yoga is all about waking up and becoming aware of your actions and habits. Now the practice of Yoga can begin and healing is accessible because attention is channeled into the here and now. Yes, Yoga is a path of real transformation and healing by way of presence.

Back to the current Yoga media circus-- now John will juggle 5 balls of fire while hula-hooping and dropping into wheel pose-- admit, it would be fantastic to see!  On the bright side the New York Times articles, even though poking ruthlessly at Yoga, has turned up Yoga students’ inner inquiry machine which I am happy to see. As we get more in touch with the Why of Yoga we fling the door of attention open and can see the real intentions for Why we practice. I want a nice butt, I want to meet hot women, I am depressed and lonely... now we are getting somewhere. Questioning is a doorway to the room of truth. Do you enter?  Not the truth of whether John Friend (a worldwide Yoga superstar) slept with wiccan women or consensually sex-texted a student but the deeper inquiry of “How can I use all that I encounter to learn more about myself and my own intentions thereby offering me the gift of developing my personal truth.  In the end, honest self-reflection will not only reveal the root of our deepest desires and motivations but will make us better leaders, teachers and students of Yoga and of Life.

When I heard the news flashes in the NYT, Huffington Post, and FB Blogs about falling Yoga rock stars, yoga as risky business, sex and yoga I realized it was time to ask myself again-- Why Yoga? I have asked this question throughout my 17 year practice and needless to say-- I am still practicing.  Here is why.

From childhood trauma, accidents, bed ridden whiplash, cracked sternum, two births to heart break Yoga has been the best healing salve I have ever applied.  This practice empowered me to step up and be my own healer. Yoga delivers a tough love punch and says~ buck-up whiners and realize that nothing or nobody is going to save you.  No teacher, no pill, no-thing outside of myself is going to do it for me.  Yoga is a relentless truth illuminating practice that calls for nothing but my full and complete honesty and presence.  It is an intense inner cooking process whose high-heat and pressure has produced a brilliant inner diamond.  This brilliant gem I speak of is  the development of a deep inner knowing-- a connection to an unwavering, blindingly bright light within that continues to astound me.  As you can imagine-- it has changed my life.  

My hope is that students buy neither the hype nor the criticism of Yoga.  That we turn to our spiritual practice whether Yoga or some other tradition to develop a process of self-reflection that leads to a revelation of our personal truth. That we listen to our own body, heart and mind and continue to evolve a living truth within. That we are less mesmerized by flowery language or the perfect asana of a rising star teacher-- and more trusting of and rooted in our direct experience. That we practice Yoga because we feel ‘something’ unmistakably beautiful unfolding. They we feel the flow and grace that inevitably comes with dedicated Yoga practice and the exhilaration and clarity that comes from nothing bought, borrowed or sold. 

YOGA is a path to awakening and it has helped me to question myself and the world I live in. To search for my own truth, to root deep in my own soul and to connect to the universal energy that is luminous and never changing.  Yes, never changing.. even if all the Yoga gurus decided to have an orgy, burn Tantric yoga flags and party all night long.

The media will move on to the next more sensational thing that comes along... and I will still be practicing and teaching what I know to be a deeply meaningful and life affirming path of Yoga.  I bow to my teachers however flawed they may be. Ultimately, they have taught me to rely on my own experience and trust myself as my own guru.  With deep respect for all yogis and yoginis. Practice on~ Namaste!

Gratitude for India~ Thank you for this Life!

During my trip to India I visited many temples and watched with ever widening eyes their sacred pujas (ceremonies).  Bells, chanting, incense, candles, milk offerings,  and 100‘s of bodies pressed together like sardines just to catch a fleeting glimpse of the puja. To watch the Indian people at these pujas was incredible. The depth of their presence, their offerings they gave and the physical prostrations astounded me. They did not just bow their head, they lay belly down, in full surrender on the cold stone floors in front of altars, shrines and murtis to prostrate at the feet of the Gods. The humility and gratefulness was so alive in their being that they would spend their own food money to buy a coconut and banana basket  and give it as an offering to Spirit.  Their devotion and love is something I will always remember when I come to my altar with gratitude in my heart.  

The Gratitude Project~

Six years ago I was suffering from a deep loss. A friend and life coach of mine suggested that I start a gratitude journal. I did so reluctantly.  I began writing down my blessings sometimes in the midst of a gut wrenching sob I could feel a fiery and willful place inside me would help me to push the pen across the page.  I sat for 5 minutes a day for the next 6 months and recorded all the things i was grateful for.  I recall one of my earliest entries,  “I am grateful for this breath...” because that is all the light I could find. Turns out that breathing is one of the most profound gifts I have ever received.  

After two months I had many pages filled with events, people and situations that appeared in my life for which I was grateful for.  Even challenges in my life began to show up in my entries as counted blessings. I remember at about 3 months I read through my journal and was astonished that I had actually forgotten that half of it had ever happened. How often have I not only forgot to  acknowledge the blessings but even forgot that they even happened?! Well, the proof was right there!  And, to see it all in writing, the pages of support in the numerous ways I was gifted completely shocked me. Not only that, but i noticed a pattern. The things that I was grateful for over time began to increase and magnify in my life. The act of channeling my thoughts, speech and actions toward the blessings not only eased my suffering but opened the flood gates of creative energy so much that a new venture emerged that would support me and my family. 

The gratitude project had a profound impact in my life and it has stayed with me. In difficult times I acknowledge the simple blessings present here and now, and  align my heart with my deepest truth.  That the light inside of us is bright, unwavering and indestructible and always shows me the way out of the dark cave of my mind and into the light of my heart. 

Namaste on this Thanksgiving Day,

Sienna

India- An Amazing Day

After many days of travel and visiting temples, witnessing and participating in sacred pujas and, being with the people of India I am completely melted like butter on a warm skillet.. lightly sizzling with Shakti. Today I left the group for an outing by myself. I am feeling a bit more brave and decided to take a rickshaw from the hotel back to Ramana Maharshi ashram at 5:30am.  While people slept soundly I crept out for my secret expedition- to witness the sacred milk offering puja to Shri Bhagavan Maharshi. Maharshi obtained enlightenment here in Triuvannamalai on Mt Arunchala. The ashram sits at the base of this amazing mountain.  After he became enlightened he went to meditate in the cave on this mountain for another 16 years.

The rickshaw ride was fantastically exhilarating as my driver swiftly dodged wandering sandus, cows, dogs, chickens, beggars, zooming motorbikes with 2-4 people balanced precariously on the back and early morning buses Indian people with dotis and sarees and the brave walking tourists who were out at that time.  We headed straight into a crimson red sun that I watched rise out of the ash colored sky.  A mystical haze made the scene dream like but I was completely taking every sight, sound, and smell in that my awareness could hold.  My driver dropped me off and I took off my shoes and entered the ashram.  Boys were chanting the vedas, people siting and meditating in the temples and visitors outside sitting quietly as peacocks strolled by. 

Chanting signalled the puja was starting so I quickly visited the temple to walk around the Ganesh murtis as he is the God of the threshold. I did pradakshan, a clockwise lap around several different murtis then went to the main site called Samadhi Temple. Inside there was first a Nandi bull who protects and watches over then the Shiva linga and finally a murti of Shri Bhagavan (R. Maharshi). This was the very site his body was buried in the 1950's. The marble floors, walls and statues (murtis) hold incredible power that I could feel pulsing through me the more I tuned in. A brahmin came in to bless the site with flowers and poured blessed mild and ghee mixture that we later drank.  Then we waved our hands over the sacred temple fire and placed ash on our foreheads.  Completely a beautiful experience.

I sat and meditated in the temple, then his room where it has been left just as he had it when he died then another side temple.  I had the most amazing meditations, meaning doors in my awareness opened up that had never been open before,, or that I had never walked through.  I witnessed my awareness contracting around experiences then expanding. I could see and feel Ramana Maharshi sweet and powerful presence near me.  I was so content and settled in my being that I remained totally still for long periods of time.  I am not sure if I was even breathing. 

Later in the day I visited the caves where he spent 16 years.. and well, that is for next time.  Just as incredible as this morning.

I feel blessed in a multitude of ways being here... no words can express. And, I give enormous thanks to those who made it possible for me to be here.  I assure you-- you are all in my heart while I visit these sacred places and are receiving darshan in a variety of forms through our connection. No time and space.. just presence.

In love,
Sienna

India- The first few days

Holy cow dung its India!  Much more than I expected in every way.. that includes all categories from sights and sounds to smells and tastes.  First off, arriving in India in 4:00am after a 23 hour journey is a strange awakening.  Even at that hour there is a hustle and bustle of craziness that you cannot believe.  Thankfully, I meet up with 3 other yoginis from our group in the lay over in Dubai (that is in the middle east, near Kuwait!) and we clumped together like oil droplets in water because our sense overload felt easier to bear together rather than separate.  Luckily, we were headed for the beach for our first 2 nights to rest and settle our tired bodies and frazzled nerves.

Warm ocean breeze, coconut palms swaying, fishing boats pushing off the shores of Kerela beaches to claim their days catch was the beautiful sight we arrived to as we checked into our rooms at 5:30am.  But just outside the gates of our this tranquil, protected hotel setting was the stark poverty that line the streets the entire 45 minute taxi ride here.  I have done my share of hanging out in Tijauana and have seen many times the shanti towns that line the US border walls but this seemed one step deeper in the muck, where it starts to seep into your boots from the top. The colossal divide between my life and the life of the majority of India's people was intense to witness and all I could do with the little energy I had was to sit on the wicker porch chair and gaze into the horizon of the sea-- somehow that allowed me to feel my body again.  Yes, I was still here, breathing... and, resting as much as I could with what IS.

In India with Love,
Sienna

P.S. please excuse the tired typos... its been 3 nights in 3 different hotels and 3 crazy cities and many wondrous temples-- i think sacred ash is lofting from my forehead like snow into my eyes as i type but i am too tired to wipe it away. and, it IS a sacred blessings from the Brahmin temple priests so i gratefully leave it be.   good night.