Full Spectrum Beauty ~

Last day of the yoga therapy immersion with John.. more tears and more laughter.  The ends of the spectrum became more full and the container more expansive with every passing day.  People speaking of terrible accidents and illnesses while also sharing incredible moments of joy, humor and heart.  Simultaneously laughing, crying and smiling all at once.  Now, that is a robust life lived to the fullest expression! That is life with all the colors of the rainbow and that rainbow is arched across the whole damn sky where the shiny, golden sun beams pierce through the puffy white cotton ball clouds. What made the rainbow?  Thunder, lightning and the soaking wet rain in the sky. All aspects create the fullness.  That is the most profound gift that life has given to me... the ability to see and feel the edges of life more fully.. the immense pain and suffering and the most profound beauty and joy.  

This became clear years ago-- I was grieving from the loss of my marriage and was crying on and off for weeks but then one day, mid-sob, I sucked in an enormous amount of air into my lungs and burst out laughing.  It was the strangest thing, my mind said-- wait!  I am sad, I am really supposed to suffer here, life is horrible.  Then I felt the edges of my mouth turn up and I began to smile.  My next thought was-- is it possible for me to feel both immensely sad and joyful at the exact same moment?  Must be because it was happening.  Then a surge of energy came through me and I felt completely free.  It was like the cage door flew open, I jumped out and spread my wings on the invisible air and took flight. It blew my mind because everything I knew about suffering and joy changed in one gasp for air. The grieving was necessary, it tore down the walls that blocked my view and the joy inside of me had never left.  

Life is magical, it has given me exactly what I need to free myself from my limited view and to see the full spectrum of who I am.  I wish for myself, my loved ones and all beings everywhere that we continue to be reminded-- as many times as it takes-- that we are spirit in material form.  We are an embodiment of the highest.  Namaste, Sienna

Love heals

John and the fire goddess Pele are cooking the whole kula today like a well done tapas pie! Tears, perspiration and shiny smiling faces were everywhere. What a tremendous honor to hear the personal stories of the local people that came through the ‘Friend-ly’ clinic today and to witness their healing. Earlier he worked with a man that snapped his achilles tendon five months ago and had it sewn back together. He has not been able to walk comfortably since. After 5 minutes with John he started to jump up and down on his foot and then took off jogging around the room, hands in the air and cheering. Later today he worked on a 71 year old woman who had a long list of symptoms that stemmed from a 30 year old trauma to the head. After 20 minutes she felt more alive and full of hope than ever. Ok, how much did John pay these people? I would be asking the same question too if I haven’t seen John do this many times this year and even experienced it myself. John says, expect a miracle.. apparently he is not kidding.

On one level it is simple, people need a compassionate, healing touch from someone who sees and affirms their true nature as one of pure light. Never underestimate the power of this above all technical therapeutic knowledge. This kind of potent energetic healing can free up years of suffering and you don’t need a medical degree to do it~ truly anyone who can see the truth with unwavering eyes can be a healer.

Another level of healing happens through steady effort. John says it comes down to this; “how badly do you want to be Free?” You have GOT to want it bad! You have GOT to be so sick of being stiff, immobile, depressed or in suffering of any kind that you will do anything to be free. This work of re-aligning the body requires effort but through effort heal can happen.

To find freedom from stiffness or injury first open to something bigger than ourselves- whatever you call it- spirit, God or higher Self. Then I teach students how to properly engage the muscles by hugging them evenly to the bone (what a beautiful practice to hug yourself from inside). This takes specific, skillful action done with steady attention and it works. We open through stability and it creates a sense of safety in the nervous system that the body can then release in to. Since bringing these teachings into my class I have received more emails than ever about how peoples bodies and lives have opened up. I am jazzed for them. I am also grateful that the teachings are coming through to help in some way. To the highest.

Namaste~ Sienna

From Why? to Wow!

All the mechanics of alignment will do very little in the long run unless we first honor the force of spirit that animates us in our lives. John emphasizes this again today like he would be happy if we only wrote this in our journals, packed up and flew back home. (However, I do have a burning question about the engagement of lower scapula that I have to ask him this week!) He reminds us that even though we learn specific ways to fire this muscle to move that bone into alignment it is always secondary to the bigger picture of opening to spirit.

I remember five years ago when I was given an assignment from my spiritual teacher to create an ‘evidence’ journal. I was to write down everything in the course of the next 5 months that would classify as synchronicity or stoke of good luck like chance meetings, right place at the right time or events that seemed horrible at first but ended up being a blessing. Within a few weeks a 1/4 of my journal was filled up. At least once a day life’s inherent perfection was proven to me, I just had to take the time to notice. It literally blew my mind and radically shifted my view on life. I always thought that my carefully constructed plan would lead me to happiness... so I painstakingly did all the ‘right’ things like every ‘good girl’ should. Luckily I also had a little rebel inside that questioned everything-- sometimes it felt as if the rebel girl and the good girl got into a hair-pulling fight at recess. This represents the dance of light and dark, shiva and shakti in the material world. Both come to be so we can know the perfection of Spirit. Writing that journal and seeing how the universe is supporting me allowed me to let go of my attachment to my plan and open to the universes plan. I not necessarily an easier ride, for me it has been a more alive, vibrant and life affirming ride- one that I could have never orchestrated on my own.

Now, tell me that when I was grief stricken during my divorce, lying on the floor of my bedroom feeling lost in a black sea of sadness and swimming in a pool of tears.. and I would have said you are crazy! However, Spirit sees the BIG picture.. we often do not. We only see a narrow view like standing on the beach looking through binoculars when spirit is standing above us looking at the entire ocean. Where we only see one bird, Sprit sees the entire flock, the global migratory patterns and so on. I could not always understand at first the reason I became divorced, lost my home or injured my shoulder but over time the bigger picture become more clear.

My truth is that the universe works in mysterious yet deeply profound ways and every time I acknowledge this I become so humbled in the face of such divine perfection that the only thing left is complete gratitude. I am human and I do forget these things, some days I want to say “Why” instead of “Wow”. But that is the reason I practice yoga~ to remember the Wow! And, from this place I bow down to the unfathomable ways in which I have been guided every step of the way.

After his Big picture reminder he says casually “Today we are working on the shoulders”. I immediately feel both happy and terrified at the same time. It is a vulnerable place for me and an area I have worked on for 10 years. The ‘caving’ in of my heart has been giving way to healing and expression. This blog is part of that expression, Thank you for reading.. there is no accident that we are connected.

Namaste~ Sienna

A Quantum Ride to Healing

“The universe is not random...life is deeply orderly. From symmetry of flower petals, the distribution of colors in the rainbow, to the rain drop patterns on the rooftop there is deep order and inter-connection in the universe and our body follows suit.” says John. This is one of those phrases where my brain explodes trying to comprehend it and yet I eagerly jump on the quantum super highway, buckle my seat belt and go for the next ride. The journey of inquiry and revelations continues and there is a child-like joy inside as I ease on the gas to explore this truth.

Because the universe and the body has a deep order, healing can happen quickly through the art of aligning our bones. “Heal 10 or even 40+ years of chronic pain in one day~ line up the body, the channels open and the body heals” says John. I heard this a few years ago and again today, my left eyebrow raised...(I can't even raise my right eyebrow, that's for the next yoga therapy session!) but I have seen him in action and more importantly I have experienced it myself using the principles.

My right hip has been torqued forward for 15 years and today it released. I felt a softening and settling in my front hip flexor that I have not felt before. Two years ago I had a similar breakthrough in my neck. After 10 years of neck pain where occasionally I could not lift my head off my pillow in the morning I worked with these alignment principles and my neck pain was gone in a week. The realigning of my hips and neck both brought up emotional releases as well.

The physical body is the outer expression of what is happening on the inside. The tension in my body began in childhood by contracting during the times I felt unsafe. I literally sunk my heart into my chest and rounded my shoulders forward to shield myself from harm. My neck pain was the physical manifestation of this long held internal pattern-- and when it final healed it was because I was ready for the pain to tell its story and be freed. The body speaks in the language of pain because it is something we ultimately listen to, right? Pain is hard to ignore for long. (On a side note; what does western medicine do for pain?... often prescribes pain killers which severs our connection to our own inner healer.) Now, that I no longer needed to protect, my muscles are safe to release and I have the profound opportunity to feel the emotional energy that arises with it. Intense as it may be, deep down I feel an unwavering inner strength that grew right out of these challenging situations. LIfe is full of miraculous and orderly spirals~ that which hurts us can heal us and then come back around to empower us. I appreciate the potency of this in my life.

All day today I had a smile inside thinking of the divine order that has lead me to this moment here in Maui sitting in front of John. There are no accidents only a deep order that resides in the universe. Everyone I have met has helped me get here and to know some aspect of the truth from the flower, to my neighbor to my spiritual teachers~ Thank you.

Mahalo and Namaste~

Sienna

Airplane yoga~ Opps!

Aloha~

I was doing yoga on the plane to Maui today... standing forward bend, lunge.. I looked down at my feet and noticed my ankles looked a little puffy... Ah, I said an inversion would be perfect for this. Hummm... I have never done an inversion on a plane, should I? Better yet, could I... in this skinny little hallway by the bathrooms? Before you know it I was kicking up into HANDSTAND on the plane... then a funny thing happened...

Hands on the floor, forward bend, one foot up then airborn with the other foot...and OPPS my right heel hit the inward fold of the accordion like bathroom door and pushed the door inward and sent my foot over my head and toward the you know what... luckily I have been doing so much core work in my practice lately that those abs kicked in and flung my legs forward again and back to the ground. Wow, Yoga helps in all kinds of situations.. it just goes show that you never know when your practice will come in handy, even if it is to get you OUT of something that your Yoga practice got you IN to in the first place! Either way, I will take it. Here's to starting off the week smiling :)

Mahalo,

Sienna

Goddess Pele destroys and creates in a fury for the highest~ John Friend's

Hi all,

Maui is known for its rock you to the core healing vibration that chews you up and spits you back out~ I am sure it is no accident that John Friend choose it for the yoga therapy training this week. Many come to Maui to heal.. some stay and some run screaming home.. the goddess Pele does not mess around. Goddess Pele is a Hawaiian Volcano and Fire Goddess~ the embodiment of both destruction and divine creative power. "She is the flame of passion and the fire of purpose, she is the energy of dynamic action and she is the glowing essence of eternal and profound love." says R.Barkemeifjer de Wit. Ok, sign me up. Tomorrow I leave for Maui to dive into the Pele's fiery arms, the blue oceans wild current and the earths sacred ground to meet myself again and again... this time its not the Iron Goddess of Paris but the Fire Goddess Pele that presides over the court of truth and transformation along with an amazing teacher, John Friend.

With anticipation I read an email from Donna at the Anusara registration office saying... "make sure to bring a journal, you will need it everyday"... I can only imagine why. I savory these concentrated times to go in.. and am also a little uneasy. But that has never scared me off before not matter what comes up. The spiritual path and the human condition fascinates me to no end. I have a ferocious curiosity about what lies inside and it propels me past the comfort of clear water into the unsettled murky water. For as long as I can remember I had this desire to know. I was the child who would climb the fence that said "no trespassers allowed" and for good or bad I had to know what was behind that chain linked fence. Sometimes I found a frothy mouthed, teeth wielding dog and sometimes I found succulent, sweet oranges hanging from low branches. No matter what I discovered, I was always going back for more. And, this trip is me climbing over the fence again.

I wade through the waters of my own soul so I can know myself, so I can be with that which blocks me from knowing who and what I am. To be real, to myself in every moment is my dedication,,, however that looks. The human condition is not always pretty, despite the images the media bombards us with, and I want to honor the realness in myself. Over the years I have glimpsed the truth that we are an embodiment of the divine~ I want to deepen my knowing of this. And, If my experiences along the way translates into helping others to see the light of their own Self then I am honored. If not I still walk, I still yearn to discover and explore my own true nature.

In love and gratitude to my teachers who have lead me here. Thich Nhat Hahn, Georg Feurestein, Thai Ashonoah, Jean Marie Hayes, TKV Desikachar, Gary Kraftsow, Mirka Kraftsow, Maritza and John Friend. I bow deeply, Namah.

Sienna

Yoga~ Plain and Simple

The spiritual path is a "Reality Project" a term coined by Stephen Cope in one of my favorite books of all time "Yoga and the Quest for True Self. In order to feel what is Real we go to its contrasting opposite.. and literally jump into the murky depths of the unreal. We dive into the illusion-- flop around, go belly up, try belly down and tread water dog paddle style until we become tired, exhausted and on the edge of giving up. Then in the darkest hour we stretch out our feet and touch the sandy bottom of Reality and walk to shore.

A famous modern day yogi A. Desai says "Reality is more sacred to me than my most sacred concept. Reality is the message of consciousness. Reality is God in disguise." Reality is this moment, a live, streaming, real-time experience of each moment where awareness is completely absorbed in what is happening now. If we do not like what is happening now then unconsciously we may move into "WHY, is this happening now?" and fight the truth of the moment. But the truth remains,, this IS happening now. So, the Reality Project begs us to change the question to "WHAT is happening now?" because then we have the opportunity to really love. From a yogic perspective, LOVE is acceptance of what is. If you are in the moment, you are in love. Now, that is the knight in shining armor of true LOVE we've been searching for not the white dress, not the house or 1.5 kids. Being in the moment, observing the truth and accepting what is. And, to choose to say "I do" to every moment, again and again. That is the essence of the spiritual path... plain and simple. It is a divine marriage of Self to Reality for the sake of LOVE.

Namaste~ Sienna

Open to the moment, and miracles are revealed.

Anusara Yoga in Paris-- I can feel the heat!

Yesterday in class John Friend said-- “Downward facing dog... now make your hands strong, grip the floor with your finger pads in total commitment to your practice and as a sign of honoring your teacher (meaning anyone who has been an inspiration in your life). He continued... “ Out of hundreds of applicants you were specifically chosen to attend this training-- you are worthy to be here! Know that it is your dharma to claim your space at this training and claim your place in the world.” I could feel a current of fear shoot up my spine because worthiness is something I have been working on my whole life. And, even though I have been teaching for almost 10 years there are still times I get nervous and think-- what the heck am I doing leading the class? I know these thoughts stem from my childhood but on some level they are still alive in me. It is similar to someone giving you a complement and then saying to yourself “ah, they must be blind!” or “they are just saying that to be nice”. This self doubt acts like a poison that eats away at us from the inside.

When John spoke yesterday his words triggered the seed of unworthiness in me and laid it out on my mat for me to practice on-- all day long. At first I resisted, an old habit of mine that I know does not work, then I turned to the quiet place inside of me that whispers the truth of who I am. With trust I allowed the discomfort to surface; the sweating, the heat and shortened breath but I stayed with it. By the end of the day I felt joy creeping in because I know these times of discomfort are golden invitations to transform the patterns that limit me. And, that the path of yoga has the power to send the stone walls built around my heart tumbling to the ground in one day. I knew that by allowing the discomfort its full expression that I would be liberated with each drop of sweat and tear that hit my mat. This process went on like a wave inside of me for 2 hours. Finally, by the end I felt more spacious and my breath deepened. I felt more alive and a fullness inside my heart like it was vibrating out of my chest. I felt humble and at the same time I felt a sense of worthiness bubbling up inside. “Whoa-yah, thank you spirit...now were talking!” I said to myself. The next day I showed up again on my mat... ready to do it all over and open up to the mystery of what I would find this time. ~Namaste Sienna

A stroll down the Rue de Rivoli

Our first afternoon stroll down Rue de Rivoli, the main street of the Louvre with buzzing outdoor cafes every 4th shop and people busily walking by. The mix of people is amazing; from model chic with strappy platform heels- emanating the Eiffel tower to ripped jean shorts with off the shoulder t-shirts and sneakers. I decided to go someplace in between... but I did bring my black strappy mini platform heels, which Kyra likes, for some later evening Paris jaunt.

Walking down the Rue we tripped over a wonderful corner outdoor cafe and sat down to our first Parisian meal. Vegetable quiche with a glass of grigio blanc for me and jamon crape with orangina for Kyra. The Place du Carrousel, the Louvre and the Jardin Des Tuileries were so close behind it felt like the most exquisite golden peacock sitting on our shoulder singing the sweet secrets of Paris in our ears. The Parian bird of culture, magnificence, human history is vastly different that of the Costa Rica bird of brilliant natural splendor and mother earths trembling vibrance but somehow I feel equally alive in both. I lounge in my black and gold wicker chair and take in the view around me. My mind is full and has an appetite for intense chatter like it gulped down 3 espresso while my body was away in the bathroom. My mind quickly tweets about everything I take in. From the awe of the intense beauty in human creation to the judgements of the our self importance and human over-indulgence. Yoga quickly hops off that mat and sits down next to me at our sidewalk cafe reminding me that these thoughts are always a reflection of myself and what I see is more about me that what I gaze upon. With that bell ringing like the hand hammered Tibetan bowl that I play in class I take another look. A half second later I see the incredible passionate beauty of human connection and creation, I see the life force in Parisian’s communication and I see a vibrant country teaming with spirited lovers of life. This touches me deeply as I recognize this succulent passion in myself as well. I feel it pumping like golden champagne in my veins.. it is the bubbly of life that has been a fountain inside of me since I was born.

Maybe the aliveness I feel is why I feel so at home in the rainforest jungle and the city jungle. I see they are both coming from the nectar of the same magnificent flower. The One flower all creation is born out of and will eventually dissolve back into. I feel immensely grateful to be here in Paris, what a wonderful creation. Tomorrow we will climb the Eiffel tower and visit the Mona Lisa.

In Parisian love and Namaste~

Sienna

My cat says..."take me to Paris, or else!"

I was away from home most of the weekend and when I returned my cat decided to welcome me with a dainty poop on my yoga mat! Pets just 'say' it like it is don't they? "meow, why did you leave me alone, you love yoga more than me, how could you??... meow" I was laughing so hard I dropped to the floor...

6 days till Paris... must figure out the cat thing.

French in 7 days?

Paris w/ John Friend .. leaving in 7 days. Wondering if I can learn to speak French in 7 days.. any gurus with instant French transmissions? Seriously, bonjour is the only word I know. Yo no comprendo, oye ve.